Dear Joe

by Jerri


Dear Joe,

I’ve held onto you through many a great wee morning hours and late night ones, especially the ones where I’d be so tired the world only operated sideways. You were there for me all those college years, through all my papers and projects. Your warmth reassured me that everything was going to be okay when you sat there as I typed away toward the deadlines. You were hot, sometimes cold, sometimes downright icy. I liked you hot.  Occasionally you would keep me awake all through those nights and made my pulse race in ways that were definitely not healthy as I tossed and turned in bed.

You were like a drug, no you were a drug and every time I’d try giving you up, I’d come running back to you all over again when the days ran long and I simply didn’t have enough strength to resist. Maybe I fancied myself the young sophisticate taking you in unadulterated states; you made my stomach do flip flops and that was when I realized that you were a bit too much.

But, I simply can’t continue this love affair anymore. You were appropriate for that season in life, and now I’ve discovered the inevitable.

You see Joe, you’re causing my acne breakouts. I don’t know why this is the case, and ideally, I’d love to be able to continue drinking you, but my skin just doesn’t agree. I went two weeks without touching you, and when my employer brought in a new fancy coffee maker, I started drinking you again. In those two weeks, my skin had cleared up unreasonably well thanks to a new routine, but suddenly it all came back and this afternoon, I realized that the reason was probably you.

So I’m returning to my old and steady flame (tea) and maybe I’ll flirt with you occasionally and even take a cup once a month, but you can no longer be a part of my daily life.